Getting Help for a Parent With Memory Loss

When an aging parent shows signs of memory loss, confusion, or cognitive decline, getting them to seek help can be challenging. Delays in diagnosing dementia are common. SciTechDaily reports it takes an average of three-and-a-half years between noticeable symptoms and a formal diagnosis.

Timely diagnosis is important. Early intervention can lead to better outcomes, and Time reports that Alzheimer’s treatments are more effective when started early.

When families know a loved one has dementia, they can begin planning for long-term care, caregiving responsibilities, and legal decisions. An older adult may still be able to execute a valid power of attorney and name a trusted decision-maker.

Although this process can be difficult, adult children can take steps to help a parent seek medical evaluation.

What Is Dementia?

Approximately one in 10 adults age 65 and older have dementia.

Dementia is a group of progressive illnesses that affect memory, thinking, and reasoning. These conditions involve damage to nerve cells or their connections in the brain.

The most common cause of dementia is Alzheimer’s disease. The Alzheimer’s Association estimates that 7.2 million people in the United States live with Alzheimer’s.

Other forms of dementia include:

• Vascular dementia

• Lewy body dementia

• Frontotemporal dementia

• Mixed dementia (multiple causes)

In some cases, dementia-like symptoms may result from an underlying medical condition. For example, urinary tract infections can cause confusion in older adults. Treating the underlying condition may restore cognitive function.

Dementia Symptoms

According to the Mayo Clinic, dementia symptoms may worsen over time and can include:

• Noticeable memory loss

• Difficulty communicating or finding words

• Getting lost more easily

• Reasoning or problem-solving challenges

• Trouble planning or completing complex tasks

• Reduced coordination

• Confusion or disorientation

• Psychological changes such as agitation, paranoia, anxiety, or depression

Memory problems and significant cognitive decline are not considered a normal part of aging and should be evaluated by a medical professional.

Why Parents May Delay Getting Help

Convincing a parent to seek medical evaluation can be difficult.

Some parents dismiss memory issues as a normal part of aging. Others may recognize something is wrong but deny symptoms due to fear of social stigma, loss of independence, or becoming a burden to family members.

When dementia has progressed further, a parent may lack insight into their condition and may not understand that help is needed.

Encouraging a Parent to Seek Help

Adult children can encourage a parent to seek medical attention, but how the conversation is handled matters.

When a parent is in the early stages of cognitive decline and can still make decisions, planning a thoughtful conversation can help. The Alzheimer’s Association recommends noting specific symptoms and whether others have observed changes.

In some cases, a parent may respond better to another trusted person, such as an older relative or close friend. The conversation should be private and calm. Large interventions may lead to anger or resistance.

Choose a time when the parent is comfortable, alert, and relaxed. Gently discuss observed symptoms and offer to accompany them to a medical appointment. Multiple conversations may be necessary.

At-Home Cognitive Tests

At-home cognitive tests may help families decide when to seek professional evaluation. While these tests cannot diagnose dementia, they can prompt next steps.

One commonly used tool is the Short Form of the Informant Questionnaire on Cognitive Decline in the Elderly, which includes 16 questions comparing cognitive abilities to those from 10 years ago.

Another option is the Self-Administered Gerocognitive Exam (SAGE) developed by Ohio State University. The SAGE test assesses multiple cognitive skills, including a clock-drawing task that may reveal issues with memory and spatial awareness.

Potential Downsides of Self-Tests

Because at-home tests are not diagnostic, they may provide false reassurance. Medical evaluation by a physician and referral to a neurologist or specialist is recommended.

If a self-test is completed, bringing it to the medical appointment may be helpful.

Key Takeaways

• Timely diagnosis of memory loss or cognitive decline allows for early intervention and future planning.

• Adult children can encourage help through sensitive conversations and by using at-home cognitive tests as a starting point for medical evaluation.